An Important Message: We Stumble, We Fall, We Pick Ourselves Back Up!

This is a long Saturday post to go over some new stuff and personal updates. I am here busy making changes to grow this site into the best it can possibly be. I have been very happy with the blog this year so far. It finally feels like a space that makes me happy. Everything is finally how I want it to be.

First update is that I begin school again on Monday, this time I am working on classes that count towards my Bachelor degree now that I have accomplished goal one and have my first degree nearly in the bag. I am very excited for what the next year will bring but it is also bitter-sweet at times.

The problem is that I should already have that associate degree but I didn’t quite hack it out and that is so embarrassing to admit. I was taking five classes last semester and failed my Anthro biology class. That really sucked. I think it was a mixture of taking too many classes at once, some definite burn-out, my full-time job, raising two boys, and just life in general.

Unfortunately, I can’t go back and get a do over and this is hard for to me admit that I failed to fully get through my first educational goal on time. The embarrassment and disappointment in myself is very real. Now with that said, there is really only one move in my deck of cards. Retake the class this semester and graduate a bit later then I had wanted to do.

I am all registered and ready to go, and thankfully, I am also going to be able to take a couple extra classes this semester and two next semester while I am in the enrollment process for SDSU which will count towards my bachelor degree. That will be very nice! By the time I am at SDSU, I will already have a few classes tucked under my belt that count towards the second goal in my ladder to my main one of getting that Masters degree in history!

Not much else can really can be said. it’s like the title of this post suggest. I fumbled, I fell, and now time to dust myself off and get back into the game, never giving up on what I am trying to achieve. As I said, it is all very bitter-sweet to me because a lot of this educational stuff does feel like a massive waste of time. That’s the honest truth coming from my heart.

Why does a history student need math, science, and other classes that have nothing to do with what I am trying to study. I honestly don’t find school to be that easy and I am often bored with it. School has never come naturally to me. There are moments where I all want to do is read my books and write. Forget the rest of it! I don’t enjoy feeling like my time is being wasted.

There is nothing I want more then to write on the blog every single day while I finish up my Women of War series and get that published for everyone to read; however, life just doesn’t work that way and I find balancing what I need to do versus what I want to do to be a daily battle.

An endless juggling act if you will. This is quite alright though. I will do my best to complete my goals and accomplish what I want. Sorry the post have been a little inconsistent this month. Life has been busy as I prepare to begin the new semester but also get my boys ready for school themselves. A bunch of school shopping, registrations, and spring cleaning have been accompany my time the last couple weeks. Life first, passions second!

Now I know I really don’t talk about my two nephews I am raising here on the blog or social media in general out of respect for their privacy, but can we take a minute to be just in awe with how fast they are growing up! These boys aren’t little anymore. One is now in eleventh grade and will graduating soon, and the youngest is in eighth grade starting high school next year!

The teen years have been full of chaos, stress, attitudes, love, joy, and happiness all mixed into a big bag of teenage emotions. There are times were I really do miss them being little. It was much easier to make them happy and always fun to play around with but now that they are older, which comes with its own problems, I can’t help but reflect on the people these two are becoming. They mean absolutely everything to me.

I couldn’t be prouder. They are handsome, smart, funny, and unique individuals that I wouldn’t change for the world. Teenagers might not be the easiest to handle and communicate with but the conversations I have with them are all the more meaningful for it. I feel happy in the assurance that I know they are going to be kind hearted, quirky, smart men capable of handling whatever life throws at them as they take on the world full force.

Sometimes I worry too much and don’t treat them like they aren’t little kids anymore. It is so hard for me to realize how mature they are really getting, especially my oldest nephew. There is so much I admire about him. He is so very funny, kind, practical, matter of fact, and just world wise. There is nothing he won’t accomplish once he has the mind to make it happen. The youngest has such a kind honest soul and very sweet personality, he feels the world around him deeply, and is very book smart. I’m looking forward to seeing what they do. There are going to fly and rise so high in life.

Second update is that I have made two new groups. One is a history group called The History Table and the other is called The Bookends Book Club. If any or both interest readers then please feel free to join! New members are quite welcomed and both groups could benefit from some fresh minds sharing their books, ideas, history discussions, and everything related.

Furthermore, I am working very hard to finish book one of Women of War but have to admit that this month has seen zero going towards that goal. It is a bit disheartening. If there were only just more time in the day, and I honestly did need a bit of a break so I don’t start feeling too burnt out again. Once there is anything tangible to share with everybody, I will be posting immediately and can’t wait until I have something to say!

Now I want to end this post with a lovely quote by Amelia Earhart – “The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward.” 

Sincerely,
Samantha


14 thoughts on “An Important Message: We Stumble, We Fall, We Pick Ourselves Back Up!

  1. Don’t put yourself down. It is amazing how much you are juggling along with your studies.
    You also need time to disconnect and relax. I am sure you will do great next time around. If it is any consolation, I failed my physics first time around. It happens. Just keep trying and you’ll have it in the bag in no time.
    Best of luck to you!

    Liked by 2 people

      • You are so productive and do too much stuff already. Plus, having a family. Which is also a lot of work.
        Life is meant to be enjoyed, not stressed about.
        Sometimes is better to take extra time for something and clear your mind than doing too much and end up hating something you once love.
        Honestly, you are too hard on yourself. You should be more than proud already of your achievements

        Liked by 2 people

      • Very wise and kind words there! I only share these inner struggles in hope that it makes someone else feel less alone and to show that’s it’s okay when things go differently. That it’s okay to like you say, step back, re-evaluate, try again, or change course to meet your needs. It’s important for everybody to give themselves some grace. ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I second what Weird History facts said and while it is a bit disheartening, something could be saying to slow down just a little bit and you know what that’s okay. Samantha you’ve got this! Everything will turn out the way it is supposed to, and in due time you will finish your novel. Also don’t look at not getting your degree yet as a failure, because it isn’t you still have a chance, and it is never ever a waste trying for something that you are passionate about. I wish you peace, tons of love. You and those boys stay well and safe. I’ll be here always even in your times of respite from the blogging.

    Liked by 3 people

    • I am not going to lie and say that I am still not disappointed but I have a clear mind and ready to get right back to the thick of it and keep working for all I am trying to achieve. I really appreciate the kindness and support. At the end of the day like you guys are saying it’s important to give yourself some grace. Thank you very much Marie!

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Misery may not love company, but at least it’s nice to know someone had the same problem. Yep, failed a math course while getting my bachelor’s degree. My first paper as a Ph.D. student in history was condemned by the professor as possibly the worst paper she’d ever read. Really. Failure’s not final, especially when you learn from it. Else I’d not have a bachelor’s or a doctorate. But recovering from failure isn’t easy, don’t let motivation speakers kid you on that score. It’s hard work, not just motivation, so work at it only when the goal’s worth the effort, in your own mind.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: An Important Message: We Stumble, We Fall, We Pick Ourselves Back Up! – Stay Healthy Weekly

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